Let’s face it: Whether you’re an only child or have lived with countless pestering siblings or relatives, nothing quite prepares you for living on campus with strangers. Before climbing that mountain of social anxiety to its peak, here’s a guide to get you on a smooth path to adjusting to dorm life and turning those strangers into soon-to-be best friends.

Setting Boundaries

We all come from unique types of households and upbringings, which means you and your roommates will need to find compromises for diverse lifestyles. 

1. Noise: The two necessities of college life are to study and have fun, but with differing schedules, try talking with your roommate to understand when they are studying and need quiet time. You should remain respectful with noise levels, especially in the case of online Zoom classes, and try going outside for louder activities to show courtesy.
2. Cleanliness: A dorm offers shared amenities of a kitchen, living room, bathroom and sometimes a bedroom. Whether you’re a clean freak like Monica Geller from “Friends” or you leave every room looking like a tornado hit it, there’s help for both sides. If you lean more to the latter, show respect by cleaning up after yourself so others don’t have to pick up after you – they are not your parents! And for the former, realize that not everything will be 100% spick and span. College Board even suggests that the tidy roommate should “overlook untidiness in the roommate’s area.” If it’s in their corner of the bedroom, let it be.
3. Visitors: Once your dorm is dressed to the nines with decor or at least has a sheet on the bed, you and your roommates may invite family and friends over to see the new place. In this instance, set boundaries with your roommates; give a day or two heads up of when they’ll be over, agree where visitors are allowed to go in the dorm and set a time limit as to how long visitors can stay. Additionally, some dorms allow visitors to stay overnight. Don’t assume this is OK, check in with your roommates first as to where visitors can sleep and for how many nights.

Room change requests

In the event your roommate relationships don’t pan out and conflicts arise, room changes are possible but not guaranteed. 

According to San Francisco State University University Housing, problems should first be addressed with your resident assistant. If problems are left unresolved, you can fill out a ‘Room Change Request’ found on your Student Housing Portal. But be aware, each request comes with a $100 fee and won’t be considered until the second week of the semester.

Hangouts

Forming connections with your roommates is crucial to the college life experience. These friendships can aid in advice, schoolwork and simply having fun. 

1. Shared Meals: During your first week on campus, head to the Monarca and Yerba Buena dining halls or trek to Stonestown for a meal and get to know one another. When schedules get busy, aim for one or two meals together throughout the week to catch up. Develop this habit and see your relationships blossom!
2. Night on the town or night in: San Francisco is a hub for exciting day and night life. Once you get to know what your roommates are interested in, find activities that you can do together. They may not interest you personally, but it will get you to try new things out of your comfort zone. If staying in sounds better, schedule a weekly TV or movie night where you can place the textbooks aside and laugh with one another.

Make a temporary dorm feel like home

The blank walls and basic furniture in dorms can make them feel overwhelmingly empty. Luckily, with a few simple and inexpensive touches, your dorm can look as cool as they seemed in the movies.

1. Choose a theme: A good way to add character to any dorm while simultaneously getting closer to roommates is by brainstorming a theme. Scour Pinterest for examples of what could work for your space; maybe it’s darker tones, cottage core or a sporty design. Once a theme is chosen, search Amazon and Target for inexpensive decor that makes you forget all about the drab cabinets and countertops.
2. Embrace your space: Tastes may not align, so a main theme might not be for you. A dorm should be a place that feels like home and reflects parts of who you are. If sharing a bedroom, ask your roommate if the placement of certain items is OK before setting up, then have at it.

Dorm essentials for a smooth semester

It’s inevitable that you forgot to pack or buy something before starting the semester. In case you’ve missed an essential, review this list of forget-me-nots:

1. Phone charging station/phone chargers: A charging station is a great addition to a study desk or nightstand where your gadgets can charge up while you lock into your studies.
2. Power strip/extension cords: Even with all the stretching and pulling, your cords are most likely to fall short. Rather than ruining shorter cords, invest in a power strip and extension cords to make connecting easier.
3. Water Purifier: Although SFSU has multiple water refill stations, getting clean water can be a hassle. Cut the extra trip and get fresh water in a few minutes.
4. Small portable fan: San Francisco weather is unpredictable, and despite the usual cloud cover, dorm rooms can capture heat. A personal fan can be the saving grace when studying or cooking in tight spaces.
5. Desk and standing lamps: Some dorms don’t have lighting besides a couple of switches. Rather than be left in the dark, invest in a desk lamp for study nights and a standing lamp to bring overall brightness to a room.

As the semester starts to inch closer and closer, so does moving into your dorm and meeting your roommates. In reality, your roommates probably share the same worries about living on campus as you do. Anxiety may be high, but this guide can help put your fears to rest. It takes time to adjust, so take a deep breath and enjoy the present moments; college flies by in a flash!